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Being A Bridesmaid

December 5th, 2009 admin No comments

Author: Eric Hartwellbr
Source: isnare.combr
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Bridesmaids are the faithful, caring attendants of the bride at weddings. Usually, theyre girls or young women that bear some relational association to the upcoming bride, either a close friend or relative. They attend to the bride before and after a wedding ceremony. Theyre usually the ones in the movies that buoy the bride, listen to her fears, cheer her on, help her with preparations, and pass on the collective excitement. The maid of honor is the most esteemed bridesmaid, and she plays a principal part. There is no fixed bridesmaid quantity because the decision has historically been left to the bride. The size of the bridesmaid group is sometimes associated, as a reflection, with wealth, success, or, obviously, how popular the bride is.

The term has wrought an idiom in modern times that glumly says, always the bridesmaid, never the bride. This phrase is set aside for those delegated to a role of prime importance, yet they always fall short of the high honor or central import of an event.

The history of bridesmaids dates back to Roman times when an army of similarly clad bridesmaids would accompany the bride to the new husbands locale or village. In essence, these guards would protect the bride from robbers and bandits. In later times, the Romans made it a law to have 10 witnesses present at a wedding in order to ward off evil, magical spirits that were determined to destroy the marriages fruitful conception and progress. These attendants, both bridesmaids and ushers, dressed in identical wear to the groom and bride, thus confusing the evil spirits that wished harm on the couple-to-be.

Bridesmaids are customarily given gifts for their efforts and the brides appreciation of their inherent qualities. After all, theyre the ones the bride has chosen to publicly accompany her on the most important day of her new life. Some good gifts are necklaces, earrings, stark white long gloves, and the wedding day attire itself. Personalized gifts that commemorate the days special events and the bridesmaids participation, especially ones that are valuable too, are particularly appealing. They mark a feeling of togetherness and shared experiences. Its much more personal than a gift certificate. If the wedding is at a tropical travel destination, consider a bounteous gift of a days treatment at the spa. Just make sure that someone is there to take a picture afterward. Have it framed specially and send a copy to all the bridesmaids for their children and their grandchildren. Make an impact with your gift choice that wont be forgotten. Handmade scarves, bracelets, wine glasses, chocolates, bottles of wine, bath salts, body products, scented candles, etc. are all genuinely good too.

Dresses for bridesmaids are a particularly important element, and they come in Bella Satin, Chiffron, Crystal Chiffron, Duchess Satin, Matte Satin, Nu-Georgette, Organdy, Renaissance Satin, and others. They come in royal blue, midnight, mocha, ginger, flame, sage green, forest green, frosty white, rose, ruby, sapphire, sorbet, sugar plum, tangerine, taupe, ruby, perwinkle, and bright pink, plus many more colors.br
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Marriage, Warnings, Affairs and Healing

November 17th, 2009 admin No comments

Author: Steve Wickham
Source: ezinearticles.com

It’s almost untenable for a man to say it, but a straying wifehas almost always strayed due to either abuse or neglect on the part of the husband; and most often it seems it’s because of the latter. And how can this man say it? He’s known a wife that strayed–one that never returned. Not that he was entirely to blame, but he’s seen how easily it happens.

The quote below tells of another man who learned this stark truth:

“Her affair was a symptom of a terminally ill marriage. I’m not excusing her behavior, but I was not an attentive, loving, encouraging husband. She repeatedly told me how sad, lonely, and discouraged she felt and I selfishly tried to talk her out of her needs. I didn’t compliment her enough and I was not the spiritual leader of our home. Our marriage was a mess and a lot of that was my fault.”

When my former wife decided that the marriage was over, having fallen for another man, I was absolutely devastated as anyone would expect. I thought it would never happen to me. I thought she had it good (or ‘good enough’) with me. I was comfortable and grew too comfortable. I had a good job but travelled too much. I drank too much on weekends and preferred the company of the television to her. Though I was generally loving, I could at times be distant, harsh and critical. I was quite an imperfect husband.

In the end, I got a rude slap-in-the-face type of awakening and it took me close to a year to get over it. I tried everything I could for nine monthsto put the marriage back together but it wasn’t meant to be. It was too late in my case.

And this subject of extra-marital affairs, of course, has not just affectedme.It affects all manner of married couples and there’s all manner of outcomes. I’ve got a unique and special interest in this subject and have studied it keenly… learning about what’s happened to other marriages. It sparks my curiosity.

I feel good for those who, with lots of hard work, decide to put their marriages back together, confronting all the negative emotion;I often wished I’d have had that opportunity, mainly for the kids and my former wife’s benefit. But now I’m abundantly happily married to the most special and most beautiful woman I’ve ever known.

The key issue I thinkis we men never really get the warnings we need. We need to be beaten over the head with a baseball bat to really understand. And life’s not like that. The wife will often take matters into her own hands before that occurs. I felt I didn’t get the “notice” I needed to shape up, yet it didn’t matter in the end that my former wife had been trying to communicate it to me for several months, if not years beforehand, yet I did not listen. We just didn’t speak the same language.

If you’ve been married for several years and have grown too comfortable or there are the slightest communication issues between you, don’t think for one moment it can’t happen to you, because it can. Shape up now while you have a chance.

Back to the gentleman who made the above quote regarding the right direction and focus for marriage:

“Our theory is: always be fine-tuning your relationship. Never let your guard down for a moment. Never take each other for granted and be careful not to get caught up in emotions because our emotions can deceive us.”[1]

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